Rememberlutions 2020

2020 was a terrible year: it started with wildfires in Australia, continued with a once-in-a-century pandemic, and ended with severe political discord. It was also one of the best years of my life: I completed a four-year combined Internal Medicine-Pediatrics residency; I was recruited to teach a history of medicine course as an adjunct professor; I studied for and passed not one but two board exams; and I got my dream job as an academic clinician-historian leading a special-needs primary-care clinic. Several weeks into the new year, it's time to finally sit down and pull the scraps of folded paper out of my Rememberlutions Jar (perhaps for the last time?). These are things I want to remember about 2020:

The first items I pulled out of the jar were a ticket to "Titans of the Ice Age," the 3D show at the La Brea Tar Pits, and my ticket to "Light of the Valkyries," the Samuel Oschin Planetarium show at Griffith Observatory. We were lucky enough to take an AMAZING trip to Los Angeles and Santa Monica right before the lock-downs started.

In the spring I taught my first course as an adjunct instructor. We made-do with class 100% on Zoom. (I just wrote a letter of recommendation for one of my students.) Zoom also made it possible to see more of my family than ever before.

I want to remember the time another resident recognized with as "a Med Peds resident and notable local badass" in an email to other residents, and when I was commended by others for my commitment to social justice and medical education. Also the feeling when a patient came out to me as trans...on the anniversary of the nightclub shooting in Orlando.

The first time I heard a murmur in a newborn baby...too bad I didn't know that those babies always need an echo, and she ended up having to be transferred to another hospital for a procedure the next day. The fellow congratulated me, but I wish I had known that to be able to prepare the parents. However, I did successfully learn how to diagnose a clavicular fracture in a newborn after shoulder dystocia from the same fellow. We celebrated the end of a long, COVID-filled month with a particularly delicious lunch of poke takeout together.

When my patient and her family were surprised to learn that the attending was my boss and not the other way around. That was the rotation on which neither the fellow nor the attending had any constructive criticism after observing me leading rounds: "The most empathetic team I have rounded with." I'm still celebrating the (one!) time we finished rounding in the hospital at 10:30am (instead of 11, 12, or 1).

The time a medical student nominated me for a professionalism award that was shared on social media. It reminds me of when a night intern cheered when she found out I would be her senior resident.

One mother of a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder I met in the ED told me my hugs were the best medicine. And when I told another mother over the phone that I was leaving my residency clinic, she cried at the thought that I wouldn't be taking care of her sons anymore.

I was interviewed by a local news organization during a socially distanced faith-based rally in support of our neighbors of color: "We are all created in God's image."

I want to remember the joy of celebrating residency graduation with my cohort-mates.

I gave a couple of lectures--on the history of epidemics and xenophobia, on women as breast cancer patients, and on the history of race in medicine--that went very well. A third-year medical student from China appreciated the first one so much that they sent me their final paper on the progression of the SARS-CoV-2 epidemic in Wuhan by way of thanks.

During the months at home, Dear Husband and I baked, took long walks in Frick Park, and held a personal disaster-themed film festival. I studied A LOT over the summer between graduation and starting my new attending position. Rosamunda and I bonded together over my textbooks. Of course we celebrated with ice cream! 

I want to remember a truly relaxing family vacation to a lake house, between board exams and when the pandemic had subsided a little, that started with a rainbow.

When a colleague (and former attending) welcomed me to the clinic with "You are a great doctor and I know you are going to be super successful. We are super excited!" 

As a new attending, I was heartened to read this comment in a specialist's note: "Discussed with patient that her PCP has done an excellent job in managing her diabetes." 

One patient told me, "On the phone the staff said you were pleasant, and it's true!" Another sent me a message: "You're the nicest doctor I've ever had, I mean that. It's why I don't go, but you're like my angel. I'm going to call you that."

We celebrated Thanksgiving together at the hospital. I got my first COVID-19 vaccination. We had a beautiful white Christmas. Finally, we went to bed on time for New Year's and woke up to 2021.

Thanks for reading! Looking back over previous years, I am struck by just how much we used to DO outside the house before (modified) quarantine became our way of life in March 2020. You can see what I mean here: as a medical student (2015), finishing medical school and starting internship (2016), when I completed intern year (2017), in the throes of residency (2018), and riding high as a senior resident (2019).